Quite ironic one would say. An article about "Male vulnerability" written by Women? Here is the thing - Speaking the Unspoken is a platform where we voice out topics often suppressed or moved over on by society. The Silence around male vulnerability is no different. It is something that is kept unsaid by the collective conscious of our society and it has become so deeply ingrained that we honestly couldn't express it properly. And so today we bring to you a very important topic retold by Women.
For centuries, men have been cast into a predetermined mold of strength. They are expected to be unyielding, stoic, and invulnerable. Our society has applauded their silence, mistaking it to be their ability to manage their issues. They have seen the generations before them and witnessed how it is discouraged to display of any crack in the famed armor of invulnerability.
Yet beneath the surface of this performance lies a truth which, if understood properly, becomes the most liberating —
VULNERABILITY IS NOT WEAKNESS.Where do we even start? Oh of course – The origin of this silence
This silence did not emerge overnight. The taboo around speaking about male vulnerability stems from our age-old belief systems where men were the guardians- the protectors who were to stay strong all times. They were expected to be levelheaded- pragmatic to take and manage decisions, and even the slightest sight of emotions was expected to be discarded. So even if you were an epitome of an ideal man like Lord Ram and were miserable seeing your wife suffer due to the comments of a mere washer man; you were to hold your fort strong and not let go of your emotions.
But this stigma does not stop at ancient tales – It curtails our Men's life even today
We romanticize male toughness in films — the unshakable hero, the stone-faced father, the warrior who feels no fear. And then, in real life, we criticize men for being "cold" or "emotionally distant." But how can a man be both? How can we chain him to silence and then blame him for not speaking?
From the time they are boys, they're told that crying makes them weak, that being afraid makes them "less of a man," and that their worth is tied to being providers or protectors.
This 'man up' conditioning leads to poor expressiveness in men making them susceptible to mental health issues. Toxic masculinity is another ball pervading the lives of gullible men who fall prey to it assuming it to be true masculinity. What should trouble us as individuals the most is the nonchalant attitude of society to ignore the root cause of abuse being inexpressiveness!
Who says that a tender heart cannot reside in a strong body?
We live in a society that claims to care. Mental health campaigns shout, "Speak up" Posters tell us "It's okay not to be okay." We applaud people who share their struggles online. But here's the question: Why does this empathy stop when the tears belong to a man?
From childhood, boys are handed rules written in stone: Don't cry. Don't complain. Don't show weakness. A scraped knee? "Boys don't cry." A broken heart? "Get over it.” A moment of fear? "Man up." We disguise this cruelty as culture but what is it really? The answer is - Emotional suffocation.
According to the World Health Organization, men are nearly three times more likely to die by suicide than women worldwide. So to the people who claim "Silence is Strength", why are so many men dying in silence?
Men are told to "open up,” yet ridiculed when they do. A father who cries is seen as weak; a husband who admits loneliness is branded "pathetic"; a male survivor of abuse is met with disbelief. We want men to be emotionally available yet punish them the moment they dare to show emotion.
We want men to be "emotionally available." Yet when they cry, we laugh.
When they admit loneliness, we call them weak.
When they confess trauma, we refuse to believe them.
Isn't this the worst kind of hypocrisy?
Here is the truth:
Society is terrified of male vulnerability. Because if men are allowed to cry, to admit fear, to show softness - the traditional image of masculinity crumbles, and with it, power structures that have thrived on silence too wither away. Strength would no longer mean domination; it would mean honesty. Manhood would no longer mean stoicism; it would mean humanity.
Male survivors of abuse or violence are among the least recognized victims in the world because to acknowledge male vulnerability is to admit that masculinity, too, bleeds.
Male vulnerability is one of those things that people sense but rarely voice out loud. It doesn't always show up in tears or obvious breakdowns, rather it hides in silence, in short tempers, in the way men pour themselves into work, or even in the way they distance themselves from the people they love.
What's easy to miss is how this isn't just an individual struggle, instead it becomes generational. A father who grew up being told not to express his emotions rarely knows how to handle his son's, so the same lesson gets passed down without words. Over decades, this cycle shapes entire families where men feel they must stay quiet about their hurt, believing that carrying it alone is part of their identity.
The law and social systems, while vital in focusing on women's safety in a country where gender-based violence is so widespread, often overlook this quieter reality of men's struggles. It's not that men face the same dangers as women — they don't. But their challenges, like untreated mental health issues, workplace pressures, or even being victims of abuse, rarely find recognition in legal or social frameworks.
The absence of space for these conversations reinforces the idea that male vulnerability simply doesn't exist, or worse, that it shouldn't.
Wait, why do I hear the fake feminists shouting in the back?
Acknowledging male vulnerability doesn't mean opposing feminism; in fact, it helps to deepen it. Feminism isn't just about protecting women; it's about breaking down the rigid structures of patriarchy that cage all genders differently.
For women, that cage often looks like oppression and violence. For men, it often looks like silence, emotional suppression, and a life lived under the constant pressure of appearing "strong." When we make space for men to express vulnerability without shame, we're not shifting the focus away from women; rather we're working towards the same goal of liberation from traditional oppressive gender norms.
Does that mean Men are doomed to suffer?
No of course not. Change is possible and it must begin in our homes. We need to work towards a future where parents allow their sons to cry without shame. It must continue into schools, where boys are taught that vulnerability is not weakness but courage. It must echo in films, books, and songs that show men not as unbreakable machines, but as normal human beings. And most of all, it must begin with men themselves reclaiming their right to say: I need help.
So, to all those handsome hunks who are sweating in gyms with a protein shake - Take ample doses of vitamin RM: Re-defined Masculinity! Learn to cry if you want to; seek help if you need to; and most importantly express yourself! Being expressive or soft does not invalidate your masculinity.
And before we leave - If boys are allowed to cry, if men are allowed to talk about fear and hurt without judgment, the cycle of toxic masculinity can break. What we need to realize is that breaking this cycle isn't just good for men; it's good for families, for relationships, and for society as a whole.
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