Consent is often simplified as “saying yes or no,” but in reality, it is much deeper. True consent is informed. It is enthusiastic, voluntary, and revocable at any moment. It isn't a one-time contract; rather it is an ongoing dynamic mutual agreement between individuals that recognizes the dignity and autonomy of individuals. Today the way we treat consent more as a talking point rather than an essential part of communication is hypocrisy in motion.
Skimming over something such as this would be a grave injustice to our readers.
Here is what everyone knows but no one dares to speak out loud
In India, consent is frequently manipulated, ignored, or even violated through cultural, social, and legal mechanisms.
People preach, "Only a YES is a YES”, but our society begs to differ in its gross reality. In India, even that YES often comes with a fine print of terms and conditions. Terms and conditions approved by patriarchy, stamped by society, and notarized by fear. We live in a society where arranged marriages for family honor and social hierarchy are said to be “consensual” but in reality these rules were never fair, the deck was stacked against, and the YES for such relationships were bought with an invisible currency called fear mongering. Fear mongering of shame being brought to the family name if the individuals did not “consent”. Fear mongering of family honor being degraded if the individuals did not “consent”.
And still, we clap politely, label it consent, and call it progress.
This happens not only in overt crimes but also in everyday situations. Emotional pressure, victim-blaming, systemic silence and moral policing are just a few examples.
And since we are on topic for Moral policing
One of the starkest examples of society undermining adult consent is the entire concept of “Love Jihad", which is nothing more than a politically charged myth suggesting that interfaith marriages, especially between Muslim men and Hindu women, are acts of coercion. Despite the fact that the Constitution guarantees individuals the right to marry whomever they choose, consenting adult couples often face harassment from families, vigilante groups, and even state machinery.
Consent here is overwritten by communal anxieties and patriarchal control. However, this stream doesn't have a single current. The Bajrang Dal and many other regional actors are often involved in this “Moral Policing" of adult CONSENTING couples.
Even in public spaces, couples holding hands or simply being together invite moral policing. Ironically, two adults capable of giving full consent are scrutinized, while forced marriages—where no real consent exists—are often celebrated under the guise of tradition.
This extends beyond religion. The tragic rise of honor killings is a chilling reminder that, for many, the community's control outweighs individual autonomy.
And what is sadder is that it doesn't stop at Pre Marital relationships
Even after marriage, the concept of Consent never vanishes - ideally.
Marital rape is still not recognized as a crime in India. Section 63 of the Bharatiya Nyaya Sanhita assumes that sexual consent is given once and then forever implied in a marriage. In simple words, a woman's “no” becomes invalid in her own home after marriage.
This denial to accept marital rape reflects a mindset that still persists. Women's bodies are seen as the property of their husbands, reducing consent to a state of irrelevance. Similarly, domestic abuse often thrives on silence and normalization, where victims are pressured to “adjust” rather than assert their right to bodily and emotional autonomy.
But does this really matter?
If you had to ask that question, then you sir/madam need to re-evaluate all your life choices. A society that disregards consent by either manipulating it as in forced marriages or marital abuse or through denying the acceptance of relations of consenting adults be it in interfaith love, marital relationships, or daily interactions overall breeds a culture of fear and repression.
Here's another angle - The grey area and misuse of consensual laws
Relationships, especially amongst teenagers have made manipulation very rampant - guilt tripping, promises of love or threats of break up are often used indirectly to pressure consent. Such involvement of emotions and social power makes consent harder to define in legal or transactional consents.
Yet, one cannot clap with a single hand. Both partners share responsibility. Hints, gestures and body languages are fragile hints. A simple two letter word “NO” can prevent a world of misunderstanding, hurting and trauma. One cannot realistically ask their partner to sign an affidavit before indulging in an intimate moment.
So, a simple verbal response clarifying their discomfort will clear out much of the confused air. Many might call it hard but the reality is that it is a practical step to prevent a long line of issues from ever arising.
And before we leave
We really want everyone to understand that consent must be understood as a non-negotiable foundation of any healthy relationship and society, whether between partners, within marriages, or across religious and caste lines. Acknowledging consent means affirming that every individual has an inviolable right to choose. Until India, as a society and a legal system, recognizes this fully, the struggle for true autonomy will continue.
So here is what we ask of you – Educate others about consent. Ask people around you to speak out and to voice their decision. Make them realize that they are the sole person in control of their bodily and emotional autonomy.
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